I get that it’s an over-commercialized holiday. I get that you should show your loved ones you love them year round. I get that it’s a giant reminder to single people that they are single (“Singles Awareness Day” is not new).
But I choose to celebrate anyway. I don’t need dozens of flowers or an expensive meal out (though chocolate is nice). What I need is the reminder to take a few minutes out of a busy, hectic schedule to really look my husband in the eyes and tell him what he means to me. To think through why it is that I married him and what makes us work. To remember that through it all, the dirty diapers and frantic meal prep in the evenings, the arguments, the difficulty finding time for each other without a toddler scrambling for our attention, the desire to sit on the couch in the evening and mindlessly watch TV after a long day … through all those things, there are just as many wonderful things about my husband’s and my life together.
There’s the mornings we spend laying in bed together just talking before Noah wakes up. Sitting on the floor in the living room shooting basketball on Noah’s little indoor goal. Trips to the farmer’s market. The occasional date night we manage to sneak in where we frequently end up at either a book store or a coffee shop or a coffee shop in a book store. The way he will sometimes stroke my hair absentmindedly when we are cuddled on the couch to watch TV. How we smush Noah’s face between ours with kisses. The way he throws Noah up in the air until the child is gasping for air from laughing and screaming, “Higher! Higher!”
All these little things that I love about Bobby can get lost in the shuffle of every day life. At the end of a long day at work, sometimes it’s just more likely that we are going to snip at each other about who will cook dinner and who will bathe Noah. Sometimes we don’t want to talk because it requires too much brainpower after a long day of meetings or keeping the kiddo.
I need the reminder. Valentine’s Day to me isn’t about red and pink hearts or balloons or roses or cards. It’s about taking the time to remember and to show just what it is you love about the special people in your life.
Want to read more from another Valentine’s Day advocate? I really enjoyed this piece on Slate, titled “Yes I love Valentine’s Day (and that doesn’t make me a brainwashed moron, you snobs).”